This is Awkward



I'm a bit much for folks. I'm like a dog. I get very very excited to see you.

 I have much more in common with dogs than I do with people.  I am an awkward person.  Surprise!  I am without the ability to act comfortably social.  I tend to either run away or go full force forward onto people with a wild eyed passion that I know can be off putting.  And yet, this is who I am.  I either don't do anything and act really painfully shy, or even worse, I start dry humping your leg with my enthusiasm, both are awkward. 

the comic that inspired this post.

I get too personal.  I ask too many questions.  I make people uncomfortable.  I genuinely want to know things about people and so I ask.  And I get myself in trouble sometimes.  But overall, WORTH IT.  And yet, knowing all this about myself, I don't really try to be "appropriate".  And actually I quite like being awkward.   There, I said it.

I would take being awkward over not giving a shit any day. But the problem really comes when I encounter another similarly awkward person.  We try to out-awkward each other.  Not on purpose, mind you, but it just happens naturally.  And when you witness an awkward stand off, it is about the most painful interaction you will ever see or hear.  There is much sighing and heaving and trying to fill the dead air with something, GOD, anything.  And it usually ends with someone saying, ".....so, yeah....." or something of the like because we can't seem to finish a sentence and just leave it at that.  Or, as I have done many times after filling a shopping cart full of stuff I can't make a decision on, I will just leave it and flee the scene.
Thank flying spaghetti monster for my job and AA and my family and real life friends and having to talk to people or else I would never get out from behind my computer.  I would be content to just form these relationships that can be thought out and planned, so much easier for a person who suffers from awkwardness.   I do much better from behind this wall, but the fear and awkwardness must be conquered!  Forcing myself to get out and talk to people *shudder*, is about the scariest thing for me to do.  And yet, I do it.  One day at a time, just like every other fucking thing.

WATCH THIS!  This is how I imagine I look pretty much all of the time in life.  Just this awkward weirdo pee pee move at all time. 
Link to Craig Ferguson Talking about Sex Education in Scotland
I know, I know.

And then there's the dancing, which doesn't happen very often and usually not when others are dancing, but just me by myself, looks almost identical to this:

I know, it's cliche and used a lot, but anyone who knows me would be hard pressed to disagree.

In closing, next time I come traipsing over and tackle you with licks and panting and tail wagging because of how much I adore you, don't be afraid, it's simply me being enthusiastic about you.  Or if I just act painfully shy, and  kind of ignore you?  It's because I don't really like you.  Or maybe, just maybe, it's because I like you that much more. 

Just give me a pat on the head and a kind word, and I will move along.  I will do my best not to drool on you. 

Jingle. at Best Friends DogTown.